The Enduring Fabric: Marriage as Custom and Convention

Marriage, often perceived as a deeply personal union, is, upon closer philosophical inspection, a profound testament to the power of Custom and Convention. Far from being a mere private arrangement, it stands as a foundational institution of the Family, shaped by centuries of societal agreement, moral imperative, and legal codification. This article delves into how these established norms define the marital compact, prescribing specific roles, Duty, and responsibilities, thereby underpinning the very structure of human society as illuminated by the Great Books of the Western World.

The Enduring Fabric of Human Society: Marriage as Custom and Convention

At its core, marriage is a social construct, a formalized agreement that transcends simple biological pairing. While the impulse to procreate and form lasting bonds might be natural, the specific forms, rituals, and expectations surrounding these unions are products of Custom and Convention. These are the unwritten rules and established practices that a community collectively observes, evolving over time to become the bedrock of social order. In the context of marriage, they dictate everything from who can marry whom, to the ceremonies involved, and the subsequent obligations that bind spouses and their Family.

From Natural Impulse to Social Construct: The Evolution of Marriage

The Great Books reveal a consistent thread: thinkers grappling with the tension between individual desire and societal necessity. Ancient philosophers, particularly Plato and Aristotle, recognized the critical role of the Family and, by extension, marriage, in the formation and stability of the polis (city-state).

In Aristotle's Politics, the household (oikos) is presented as the primary association, naturally formed for the satisfaction of daily needs, with marriage as its central pillar. It is "the association established by nature for the supply of men's everyday wants." Here, marriage is not just about individual happiness but about the perpetuation and well-being of the community. This foundational view underscores how quickly a natural impulse became codified by Custom, transforming into a recognized social institution with public implications.

The Philosophical Roots of Matrimonial Order

Philosophers throughout history have sought to understand the rationale behind marriage's conventional structure. From the biblical accounts in Genesis, which describe the institution of marriage as divine ordinance, to the meticulous analyses of figures like Thomas Aquinas in his Summa Theologica, there is a consistent exploration of marriage's purpose beyond mere companionship. Aquinas, drawing on natural Law, articulated marriage's dual ends: the procreation and education of offspring, and the mutual fidelity of the spouses. These ends are not arbitrary but are seen as inherent goods, upheld and reinforced by Custom and Convention.

(Image: A detailed allegorical painting from the Renaissance depicting a wedding ceremony. The bride and groom stand center, hands clasped, surrounded by a diverse crowd of onlookers representing different social strata, including a robed philosopher observing from the side, a priest officiating, and children playing. The background shows a bustling town square with architectural elements that combine classical Roman arches with medieval structures, symbolizing the continuity of tradition. Light streams in from an unseen source, illuminating the central figures, while shadows play on the periphery, suggesting the weight of societal expectations and the enduring nature of human institutions.)

The Binding Force: Law, Duty, and the Marital Compact

As Custom and Convention solidify, they often transition into formal Law. The expectations surrounding marriage, once merely social norms, become legally enforceable obligations. This transition is crucial, as it imbues marriage with a public character and provides a framework for resolving disputes and ensuring adherence to societal expectations.

John Locke, in his Two Treatises of Government, discusses "conjugal society" as a voluntary compact, yet one that carries specific duties. While emphasizing consent, Locke still acknowledges the pre-existing framework of custom and law that defines this union, particularly regarding the care and support of children. The specific terms of this "compact," though agreed upon by individuals, are largely dictated by the prevailing Custom and Convention of their society.

Consider the inherent Duty associated with marriage:

  • Duty of Fidelity: Often a cornerstone, enforced by social opprobrium and, historically, by severe legal penalties.
  • Duty of Support: Spouses traditionally bear a mutual obligation to support each other and their children.
  • Duty of Procreation and Nurturing: While not always explicitly legally enforced today, historically, the expectation to have and raise children was a primary societal Duty within marriage.
  • Duty of Social Representation: The married couple often represents a unit within the community, fulfilling certain social expectations and contributing to the collective good.

These duties, whether enshrined in religious texts, common Law, or philosophical treatises, are not arbitrary. They reflect a collective understanding of what is necessary for the stability of the Family and, by extension, the larger community.

Marriage as a Microcosm of the State: The Family Unit

The Family, established through marriage, has long been viewed as the fundamental building block of society, a microcosm of the state itself. Aristotle, in Politics, famously posits that the state originates from the household. The principles of order, hierarchy (though contested in modern times), and cooperation learned within the family unit are thought to translate to the broader political sphere.

Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel, in his Philosophy of Right, describes the family as the first stage of ethical life, where individuals move beyond mere self-interest to a unity based on love and shared purpose. Here, Custom and Convention within the family — rituals, shared meals, parental authority, filial respect — serve to instill ethical principles that are vital for citizenship. The specific customs surrounding marriage thus shape the very moral fabric of the individuals who will constitute the state.

The Dynamic Nature of Convention: Adaptation and Continuity

While deeply rooted in Custom and Convention, marriage is not static. History demonstrates its remarkable adaptability. From arranged marriages to unions based on romantic love, from polygamy in certain cultures to monogamy in others, the forms and norms have shifted. However, the underlying philosophical questions persist: What is the purpose of marriage? What duties does it entail? How does it serve the Family and society? These questions continue to be debated, reflecting the ongoing evolution of Custom and Convention in response to changing social realities, technological advancements, and evolving ethical perspectives. Yet, the institution's resilience speaks to the enduring human need for formalized bonds and the societal benefits they provide.

The custom and convention of marriage, therefore, is not merely a historical relic but a living testament to humanity's ongoing quest to order its most intimate relationships in a way that fosters stability, perpetuates society, and provides a framework for individual Duty and collective flourishing.

YouTube:

  1. "Great Books of the Western World: Aristotle on Family and Polis"
  2. "The Philosophy of Marriage: Custom, Law, and Duty"

Video by: The School of Life

💡 Want different videos? Search YouTube for: "The Custom and Convention of Marriage (Family) philosophy"

Share this post