Bill Maher

I have a problem with people who take the Constitution loosely and the Bible literally.

Religion, to me, is a bureaucracy between man and God that I don't need.

Everything that used to be a sin is now a disease.

The Bible looks like it started out as a game of Mad Libs.

I think flying planes into a building was a faith-based initiative. I think religion is a neurological disorder.

We have the Bill of Rights. What we need is a Bill of Responsibilities.

We need more people speaking out. This country is not overrun with rebels and free thinkers. It's overrun with sheep and conformists.

Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.

Suicide is man's way of telling God, "You can't fire me - I quit."