Don't Tell Your Wife
Longer than a winter's night for a man who is ill-wed.
- Luis de Góngora (1561-1627)
Chuck is Over Board - Another planksip Möbius of See Sickness
Don't Tell Your Wife
Inspired by Luis de Góngora (1561-1627)'s quote, "Longer than a winter's night for a man who is ill-wed.". The titled responsion is
Forever feels like a long time when the union is ill-wed. Intentionality, context and commitment contribute and inhibit the outcome and potential of pair-bonded bifurcation. Where did Chuck go?
"I feel like a long time when the marriage is ill-wed," the old song goes. While it's easy to understand how it feels when you're in the thick of something like a divorce, it's a little harder to grasp how you feel when the love of your life is in divorce court. So just how does your heart feel when you know that the marriage is over?
Of course, it's important to realize that feelings are very different from emotions and feelings, so sometimes they are not always predictable. You may even be surprised that you have mixed feelings when the truth is revealed. But there are some feelings that will stay with you forever.
The first and most obvious feeling is a disappointment. You may even think that it was the decision that was wrong. But once you come to realize that it was the love of the other person that was wrong, your disappointment is lessened. This is often the hardest to get past because you are so invested in the relationship that you feel a loss of interest in the person you once loved.
Then there is the anger. When this emotion takes over, it can sometimes feel like the love of your life is doing something to ruin your life. It's almost as if you can't function because of the pain and suffering caused by the other person. You feel the need to make the other person pay for their actions, to do something about what you feel they are causing you.
Anger can be overcome by another feeling: sadness. This is often the hardest to deal with because there are usually so much anger and hurt in the relationship that the pain will seem unbearable.
A third feeling is a sadness because of the thought of what it would mean for the children and yourself. Sometimes, all the other people in the world are good and loving, but when it comes to your spouse, you need to look at the bright side of things. It's never pleasant to think about what it would be like to grow old with your spouse but the reality is that many marriages end in divorce because of heartache and sadness over losing a partner.
One last feeling that you might feel after the marriage has ended is sadness over the money. When you are no longer married, the divorce means that you are living on your own and you will likely be responsible for your own financial situation. Although money is important, there is a way to take care of yourself after a divorce.
And finally, there is a very simple feeling. If you are lucky, it's a relief. It's a relief to know that you are able to continue to live your life without your partner. After all, you are no longer living together and have the chance to live for you.
When this happens, you will have to learn to accept that feeling. For some people, this can be the hardest feeling. They feel betrayed and sad, but then the next step is to try to find out what happened and why it has happened. If your spouse has done something bad, you need to find out what it was, apologize, and work on it together if there is a chance to do that.
If your spouse did nothing wrong and the affair occurred because of infidelity, the feeling you feel will probably be one of anger and jealousy. Don't let those feelings consume you. because it will only add fuel to the fire that is burning. your marriage.
You may feel that you have been taken advantage of and you can't trust your spouse anymore. You may want to find new ways of getting back together. If the affair was committed because of infidelity, that can also cause feelings of anger and hurt, but these feelings will dissipate when you can see how your spouse acts and feels about the affair and its impact on their life.
The key to making your marriage work is accepting that feeling and learning how to deal with it. You may have to try a few things before you find the solution, but after you figure out the problem, your marriage can become stronger than ever.